Sign my Guestbook] - [Read my Guestbook
[Guestbook by TheGuestBook.com]
Friday, January 23, 2004
Now she keep sticking me on the potty. Can't think what for. I'm too busy to interrupt my schedule just to sit on a piece of plastic and "do a wee". Whatever that might be.
Could be that wet stuff that suddenly appears, making me cold wet and uncofortable. What's that got to do with a potty? Ah well, the ways of parents do not bear close scrutiny. doubtless it will become clear in time.
In the meantime I get to sit at home watching Clangers, Fantasia and Pingu on a continuous loop, whilst drinking loads of juice and eating nanas. Nice.
Thursday, January 15, 2004
Boy is this life fun. Apparrently Mummy has "buttons" and I know how to press them! It's all a subtle way of keeping the power balance my side.
RULES OF BUTTON PRESSING:
1. Say "no" to everything. Then suddenly change your mind when they least expect it.
2. Spend one day being angelically good then throw enormous wobbly at bedtime.
3. Refuse to get in the car, refuse to get out of the car, refuse to get back in the car, demand biscuits at the top of your voice when car is in outside lane of motorway overtaking big lorry.
4. Eat everything on your plate.
5. Eat nothing.
6. Copy your mother's "angry" voice when demanding services, e.g. "Get up right now, Mummy!"
7. Throw wobbly, then be extra specially cudddly and call your Mummy "kissy-face".
8. Cuddle and kiss one parent to the exclusion of the other. Make out like you think the excluded parent is The Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
9. Remember: you're the boss. WHO'S THE BABY!?
Saturday, September 20, 2003
I got a pretty dress. It's white with a big purple sparkly bit round it. I am beautiful. I had to sit around for ages while Grandad shouted at Auntie Esther and Uncle Tristan. Mummy got up and I had to tell her to sit down. Then we went outside and some woman kept moving people around and pointing a camera at them. I was tired and cold. I needed food. I got it! Loads of it. Sausages, bread, stuff in pastry, sweeties, juice, strawberries, cake, you name it, I et it.
Feeling loads better now, run round madly attracting admiring glances and being winsome. Boy, I'm getting good at it. Mummy and Auntie Esther had pretty dresses but not as pretty as mine. Neither are they.
Apparrently I was put to bed but I don't remember. I guess I bombed. Got up to find all, and I mean all the aunties and uncles there for breakfast in a huge room. I had srawberries for breakfast. Cool.
Thursday, July 10, 2003
I've been to the zoo. It was dead cool, specially when the ducklings came up and pecked my knees. In fact the ducklings were the highlight for me. Strange pink birds, large smelly grey things, hairy orange things (thought for a minute Uncle Kent had got stuck in a cage), Animal, schmanimal. Hey, is it just me or are lions boooooring! You get told all your life about big cat-like creatures that go GRRRR and pounce on things, and the reality is just some fat furry thing lying around and burping. Life is full of anti-climaxes.
It's too hot. I am bad-tempered and whingy. That's what Mummy says anyway. I thought she was the bad-tempered whingy one.
Sunday, June 29, 2003
We went to live in the wendy house again near the seaside. Is the seaside a new feature of my life? Does it come with age? We seem to have been to it a lot recently.
First we were there without Daddy but with Auntie Esther and Uncle Tristan. Nice enough people in their own way, but I could tell Mummy was a bit nervous without Daddy so I stayed up very late in order to look after her. In fact I didn't go to bed until she did which was very snuggly. I ejoyed so much I stayed up the next night too, wrapped in Auntie Esther's sleeping bag while the grown-ups drank special juice and giggled lots.
And I saw porpoises . At least Uncle Tristan said I did. They could have been oil slicks for all I could tell.
Tuesday, June 17, 2003
I've been to the seaside. I went on a boat and a train and another train that went on the road and on the beach and in the sea!
Go me. We did loads of stuff and my tiny 2-year-old brain can't be expected to remember all of it, can it? We went and stayed in a different house (again...) and there were some other people there. My new best friends Clea and Gwen were there with their Mummy, although their Daddy seems to be like mine in that he goes to "work" instead of playing in the sand all day. Why?
Clea is really great, she's older than me and she doesn't eat or sleep! Cool! I tried to keep up with her but found myself begging for biscuits in a very pathetic manner to stave off the swingeing hunger pangs, and sleeping in til up to 08:30 in the morning after racketing around until 11:00 the previous night. I expect I'll get the hang of it when I'm grown up like Clea. When the presure of being trendy got too much for me I went play with Gwen who is only a baby. This means I can nick Laa-Laa off her without risk of being hit with a wooden animal.
Now we seem to be home again, and I feel strangely happy about that. It should be boring, just me and Mummy and Pink Bear, but somehow I find the homely ambience enfolding me like a well-warmed nappy.
Thursday, June 05, 2003
Where's Daddy gone? Oh, look there he is again. Honestly, that man spends more time out of the house than he does in it. He did give me a pink fridge in compensation, although I have to say I hardly noticed his absence since we went to Granny & Grandad's house again. Yes I did notice! Daddy, Daddy! Mummy has been soooo horrible to me! She tried to kill me by feeding me vegetables, and she put me to bed! Waaahhh! Daddy!
Right, that's over, back to Mummy.